Naughty Mess Cake

Ok. It's not the best or most appealing name for a cake. But it's accurate. It's filthy. It's diabolical for your waistline. It's ooey gooey and gets everywhere. It's, literally, finger-lickin'.

But it's fantastic. I'm not generally boastful when it comes to baking. I like to think I'm pretty honest, actually. Most things taste pretty good; I don't always get an A for presentation, but I know what I'm better at than other things. But this was amazing. I want more.

It's Michelle's birthday this time around. I know she likes chocolate but she was already hinting that she was going to bring in a chocolate cake and because the 2 previous were chocolate I thought I'd keep it to an accent, not a base.

It looks complicated. Don't try to make this unless you're prepared for a really messy kitchen afterward. You will use most of the dishes in your house.

Crust:

230g butter

2 tbsp sugar

2 cup flour

Vanilla Pudding:

3 egg yolks

1/2 cup sugar

1/4 cup flour

2 cup milk

2 tsp vanilla extract

2 tbsp butter

Cream Cheese Layer:

225g cream cheese

1/2 cup sugar

1 tsp vanilla

1 tsp lemon juice

1 cup whipped cream

Glaze:

55g semi-sweet chocolate

2 tbsp butter

1 1/2 tsp vanilla

Additional layers:

1 1/2 cup whipped cream

225g crushed pineapple

toffee sauce

Butter a 9x13 pan. Preheat oven to 350/180/5. Beat butter and sugar until fluffy. Beat in flour until pebbly. Press into bottom of pan. Bake 20 minutes. Let cool completely.

Beat egg yolks for pudding. Set aside. Whisk sugar, flour and milk until free of lumps. Set on medium heat. Cook until just a boil. Remove from heat, stir a little into eggs. Pour egg mix back into pan. Cook 1-2 minutes until thickened, whisking occasionally. Remove from heat, pour into a bowl, add vanilla and butter and mix until melted. Chill with cling film pressed on top of pudding (to prevent skin).

Beat cream cheese, sugar, vanilla and lemon juice. Fold a scoop of whipped cream into mix then fold rest in.

Melt chocolate with butter and vanilla.

To assemble: Spread crust with cream cheese mix, then crushed pineapple, toffee, pudding, and lastly, whipped cream. Drizzle with glaze. It's best if let to chill overnight in the fridge. It helps all the layers to set, mix and soak with each other.

Chocolate Toffee Cake

Let's start with the first of September's run of birthday cakes: Dave's.

The original name of this cake is a little ambitious. The recipe I based this cake off of is actually called better-than-sex cake. I'm not sure how the two are comparable? I guess both are physical and you can eat cake with another person.

It's too early in the morning to get philisophical about cake names.

For this, use any chocolate cake recipe you prefer. It can be made with cocoa powder, melted chocolate or both. You could even throw in chocolate chips if you wish. The actual base nature of the cake doesn't matter, just that it's chocolate and any additions don't clash with toffee.

1 chocolate cake

1 can sweetened condensed milk

toffee fudge (either homemade or the premade ice cream topping)

Whipping cream

2 tbsp icing sugar

crushed chocolate toffee bars

Bake your cake according to your recipe instructions.

As soon as you pull the cake out of the oven, poke holes or cut slits into the top. Pour sweetened condensed milk over, letting little bits soak in before pouring on more. You can use the whole can or just a bit, it's up to you (I only used about half).

Once soaked in, pour over toffee and let soak into cake.

Let cake cool entirely. Whip cream and sugar together until stiff and spreadable. Spread over cake. You can spread the sides of the cake as well or you can leave them bear. Pile crushed chocolate toffee bars on top. And your done!

As you can see from mine, I baked two cake round, soaked milk and toffee on top of both cakes and put the whipped cream in the middle (and yes, mine did come out a little wonky. boo).